Sparkling
Musings

When you’re totally crushed out and crushed…

Guy I like a lot posted a picture.

It looks like he’s at a wedding. Possibly his wedding?!?!
I do not know. But he’s looking into someone’s eyes. Dammit ARGH.
Ok,  by now, I gather you realize he’s not into me.

Yeah best advice ever to women out there. LISTEN.
If he’s not calling, if he’s not asking you out, if he’s not making plans with you —
HE’s just NOT into you.
Do I know that? Yeah sure, my brain does.
My heart is an entirely different matter. It’s got a mind of it’s own. ha ha. Not so funny really.

So what do I do? I should close the photo and move on.
But NOOOoooo. I download the photo and keep on looking at it, torturing myself unnecessarily with thoughts of “WHO’s he staring at? He’s definitely flirting with a female right?? Why not meeee? Is he proposing??? Is this his wedding?!?!”

Yeah, I really should stop looking at the photo and driving myself crazy. I really should stop thinking about him and throw him into exile. But I like him — even though I know he’s wrong for me.

I like him because we have so much in common, we enjoy the same things and we have a great time hanging out together (or maybe it’s only me that thinks that seeing how he has stopped calling).
I’m smart, sassy, pleasant enough to look at and I just do NOT understand why he’s not into me.

I often get hung up on that very question – why isn’t so and so into me? Why didn’t he want to be with me?
Not because I’m looking desperately to be with someone, in fact, I’d rather be single than be with the wrong person but there definitely have been guys that I’ve come across that I would have liked to spend more time with to figure out if there was something there that could have led to a relationship. I guess their silence decided there wasn’t.

I know I’ll never get answers to my questions of “whys”. And I need to accept it.

Accepting things and improving yourself and 2 things that take a lot of hard work. More on that some other time.
So when you are totally crushed out by a guy, do not torture yourself by looking at his photo that’s possibly taken at his wedding, or where’s flirting with some girl that’s not you incessantly.

When you are crushed, go seek some friends who will make you feel better. Get or do something that will make you feel better — like having your favorite cup of tea or coffee, exercising. Just do anything that will make you feel better.

Now if only I would listen to myself instead of staring and reading into his picture again …
ps: help! sos!

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